Dating

You might know, or have met someone that you really fancy, but how should you go about getting that all important date? Your friends and family will all give you some good advice but the most important thing to remember is to be yourself.

Don’t worry and think that you have to come up with cheesy chat up lines or show off with the latest designer clothing to impress them. The reason they will say yes to you is because they like YOU as a person and not because of what you say or what you are wearing.

Here are some tips about getting a date:

  • Try and get one of your mates to find out what the person thinks about you. Get them to drop hints to see if you have a chance. It’s worth doing the groundwork, as you don’t want to look stupid if you ask them out and they don’t fancy you back!
  • Remember to be yourself. Don’t pretend to be something you are not and don’t try to be like your mates. The person you fancy will want to go out with you for who you are not what you aren’t. If they don’t like you for who you are, then there is no future for the relationship, so no point continuing with it.
  • Don’t wait for them to ask you – it might never happen! Take the plunge and ask them. The worse they can say is no and then at least you’ll know where you stand. Alternatively they might say yes, so why not go for it?
  • If you’re still not sure you could try becoming their friend first and start to get to know them better. Good relationships are built on friendships and as they get to know you better their feelings might develop.

If you’ve got a date you might want to think about a few things beforehand to make sure everything goes smoothly. Make sure that you decide in plenty of time what you’re going to wear and make sure it’s clean and ironed so you aren’t too stressed out on the day itself.

Awkward silences can be difficult so try and think of some things you can talk about. Think about things that link you both – things you both have in common such as school or work, families, music, films, and any shared interests.

Try and go somewhere where you will both feel comfortable – perhaps a football match, for something to eat, ice hockey, bowling, the cinema or a local shopping centre.

Don’t come on too strong. Be friendly and take one step at a time. You might make the other person feel uncomfortable and under pressure if you are too full on and they might decide not to go out on another date with you.

The most important thing to remember is to relax, have fun and enjoy yourself.

Many young people have quite a few different boyfriends and girlfriends during their teenage lives. In time, you will be able to get an idea of the right kind of person for you and what personalities match best with yours. You might get hurt along the way but we all learn from our mistakes.

Who can help?

The BBC website has some great advice on dating from Fearne Cotton. Visit http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/fearnecotton/littleblackbook/